....is better. Wow. As my momma would say, "You're growing up!" Because finally I realize why getting drunk to get it on is not an ideal situation: You can't remember getting off! I could see the advantage if you were with someone who really sucked in the sack, but when it's good - why block it out? It is however, kind of nice to have a buzz on. You know, a couple of glasses of champagne type buzz - but definitley not a lawnmower (ie. vodka bottle) buzz/roar.
This month has been a constant source of these maturity revelations, and I'm not sure if I should thank the retrograde, or just accept that I'm moving into a different realm. You know when you used to go to the amusement park and see all of the couples together and wish- 'If only I could have someone to hold my hand'. Only you don't realize it's so much more, and will, at that young age, pick almost any guy who's willing to just (and not much more) hold your hand. I finally picked a guy who wants to do way more than hold my hand and I'm seriously surprised, but very happy so far. Who says old habits die hard? I think you just discover new ones, but ones that are much healthier, productive and all the good bullshit you never thought you wanted.
I tried to work my old m.o. for one night with the new guy. And? And, he didn't catch bait and run away screaming, and I didn't feel like it was something I should do anymore. 'Cause I wake up so much happier remembering how great the night before was. So now, I've found a new m.o. and variety is the spice of life-- so here's to hoping I can stick to the change-- and most importantly, enjoy it!
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